Can we choose both?

Many of us have been taught that we must choose one or the other, but Jax’s story is a powerful reminder that true healing comes from a unified heart. In this episode, she explores the beautiful intersection of faith and spirituality, sharing what it looks like to trust, surrender, and keep moving forward by walking with both.

Listen here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1771834/episodes/18389516

Quick Highlights: What You’ll Learn from Jax’s Journey

• The “And” Philosophy: Why you don’t have to choose between traditional faith and modern spirituality—and how they complement each other.
• Trusting the “Knowing”: Recognizing the quiet inner voice (intuition) that often warns or guides us before major life shifts occur.
• Healing Through Trauma: How Jax managed her husband’s 30-foot fall by blending medical treatment with Reiki, mindset, and intentional energy work.
• The Power of Language: Why changing your internal narrative from “I am broken” to “I am healing” is a crucial step in physical and emotional recovery.

A Journey of Intuition and Sudden Change

Jax’s story isn’t just about one moment. It’s about a lifetime of learning to trust what she felt, even when she couldn’t explain it.

She grew up with a quiet awareness, a voice, and a feeling that something was guiding her.

Like many people, she didn’t always have the words for it. And like many of us, there were times when it would have been easier to ignore it… to push it aside… to tell herself it wasn’t real.

But it never really left.

As she grew older, that inner knowing became something she could no longer ignore. It showed up in her decisions, in feelings she couldn’t shake, and in moments when she just knew what to do, even if it didn’t seem logical.

And one of those moments changed everything.

She felt a strong urge to sell her home, leave New Jersey, and start fresh. There was no detailed plan. Nothing was certain. So she asked for one more sign to confirm her decision, and she received it!

She listened, trusted, and went.

But as so many of us learn… trusting doesn’t mean easy.

Not long after starting anew, her husband fell about 30 feet while working. In an instant, everything changed. Life became about hospital visits, uncertainty, and a new role she wasn’t ready for: caregiver, provider, and the steady one holding everything together.

And what makes her story even more powerful is this:

Earlier that day, she had attended a Reiki session where the practitioner told her something that had never happened before: they couldn’t ground her energy.

At the time, it didn’t completely make sense.

Looking back, it felt like her body already knew.

The “Knowing”: Trusting Your Inner Voice

There’s something Jax talks about that many people have experienced… but don’t always say out loud.

The knowing.

That gentle voice.
That sensation in your stomach.
That moment when something inside tells you, pay attention.

For Jax, it started in childhood.

She could sense, feel, and know things before they happened.

And while not everyone would describe it the same way, most people have had moments like this:

• A feeling about someone you couldn’t explain
• A decision that didn’t make sense on paper but felt right
• A moment when something told you to pause…or to go.

But here’s what happens to many of us: we question it.

We talk ourselves out of it.
We wait for proof.
We push it aside because it doesn’t fit into what we’ve been taught to trust.

Jax didn’t ignore it.

Even when it didn’t make sense.
Even when it required her to leave everything familiar.
Even when it led her into the unknown.

She listened.

And her decision to trust her feelings became a turning point in her life.

Breaking the “Either/Or” Binary

For a long time, conversations around faith and spirituality have felt divided.

You’re told to choose.

Faith or intuition.
Religion or spiritual gifts.
God or something more difficult to explain.

Jax’s story challenges that completely.

She grew up in a Jewish household.
Her husband comes from a different belief system.
Together, they built a life that didn’t require one to replace the other but allowed both to coexist.

And through her own journey, she had to wrestle with something deeply personal:

How do you honor your faith while also embracing the gifts you know you’ve been given?

What she discovered wasn’t conflict.

It was balanced.

It was understood that:

• Faith can ground you
• Spiritual awareness can guide you
• Intuition can support you

And all of it can coexist

As she says so simply, but so powerfully:

It’s not an “or.” It’s an “and.”

What Life Looks Like When It Tests What You Believe

It’s one thing to talk about faith and spirituality.

Living it is another matter, especially when life changes in a split second.

For Jax, that moment came when her husband fell nearly 30 feet while working.

One second, everything was normal.
The next, she was navigating hospitals, uncertainty, and a totally new reality.

She became the caregiver, the provider, and the steady presence holding everything together for her family.

And this is where her story transforms from mere belief into practice.

Because she didn’t rely on just one thing.

She leaned on both.

Her faith anchored her.
Her intuition led her.
Her spiritual practices strengthened her healing journey.

She practiced Reiki.
She paid attention to her energy.
She focused on the words spoken in her home.
She became intentional about her mindset, environment, and emotional stability.

Not as a substitute for medical care but in addition to it.

She understood something powerful:

Healing isn’t always one path.

It can be:

• Physical and emotional
• Medical and spiritual
• Structured and intuitive

At the same time.

And in one of the most powerful parts of her story, she shares something that still makes her pause.

Earlier that same day, before the accident, she had a Reiki session where the practitioner told her they couldn’t ground her energy… something they had never experienced before.

At the time, it didn’t fully make sense.

But later, it felt like her body already knew something was coming.

Practical Healing: Mindset and Energy Shielding

One of the strongest themes in this conversation is the link between what we carry… and how it resides within us.

The thoughts we repeat.
The words we speak.
The emotions we suppress.

They don’t just disappear.

They settle into the body.
They arrive with tension, pain, and exhaustion.
They wait for a place to go.

And sometimes, healing begins in the simplest but hardest place:

Telling the truth.

Not driven by blame.
Not fueled by anger.
But from a place of letting go.

Jax approaches this in a way that feels both practical and liberating—you don’t always have to relive every detail of the past to heal from it. But you do need to let it go.

Through words.
Through awareness.
By choosing not to hold it in.

Because what you say… shapes how you feel.

And what you repeat… becomes what your mind believes.

That’s where mindset and manifestation begin to matter:

• Moving from “I’m broken” to “I am healing”
• Shifting from fear to trust
• Replacing constant stress with intentional thought

Not in a way that ignores reality but in a way that supports it.

Healing isn’t about pretending everything is okay.
It’s about choosing what you let take root inside of you.

And just as important as what you release is what you allow in.

Jax provides a straightforward yet impactful way to consider shielding your energy.

Imagining boundaries.
Being mindful of who and what has access to you.
Allowing in what supports you.
Keeping out what doesn’t.

Because healing isn’t only about letting go.

It’s also about learning how to safeguard what you’re creating.

You Don’t Have to Choose

If there’s one thing this conversation leaves you with, it’s this:

You don’t need to choose between faith and spirituality.
You don’t have to silence your intuition to maintain your beliefs.
You don’t have to restrict your healing to just one definition.

You are permitted to trust God…
and rely on the knowing inside you.

You are free to heal in ways that feel right to you.
You are free to grow, let go, and start fresh.

And maybe, like Jax’s story shows us

The whisper you’ve been feeling isn’t something to question.

It’s something to listen to.

Listen here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1771834/episodes/18389516

Behind closed doors, however, control and violence were quietly taking hold.

What are the signs of coercive control in a relationship?
Coercive control often involves monitoring daily activities, restricting friendships, blaming the victim during disputes, blocking exits, using intimidation, and gradually isolating a partner. These behaviors are common patterns in abusive relationships and can get worse over time.

Why do survivors of domestic violence stay in abusive relationships?                                                       Many remain because of fear, shame, financial dependence, religious pressure, concern for their children, or emotional manipulation. Abusers often use isolation and control tactics to make leaving seem impossible.

How can survivors begin healing after domestic violence?
Healing often starts by speaking the truth about the abuse, connecting with safe people, seeking counseling or support groups, and rebuilding personal confidence and decision-making skills. Community support and trauma-informed care can help survivors reclaim their voices and rebuild their lives.

Donna’s story is one example of how survivors move from silence and control toward healing, safety, and restored voice.

There was a time when silence was not a choice; it was the rule.

Donna grew up in a home where religion influenced almost every decision, and divorce was never an option considered. Families stayed together regardless of what happened inside the house. Problems were kept private. The phrase “we don’t air our dirty laundry” was repeated so often it became a way of life.

Behind closed doors, however, control and violence were quietly taking hold.

Like many survivors of domestic violence, Donna learned early how to read the room. She watched moods carefully and adjusted her behavior to avoid conflict. Safety became something she measured by others’ reactions rather than her own sense of peace.

Over time, obedience began to feel like love.

For years, she thought what was happening in her marriage was just something she had to endure.

When the O.J. Simpson Case Brought Domestic Violence Into the Public Conversation

In the 1990s, the highly publicized O.J. Simpson case brought the issue of domestic violence into the national spotlight. News reports began discussing patterns of abuse, intimidation, and violence within relationships. For many Americans, it was the first time the phrase domestic violence was openly discussed in homes, on television, and in newspapers.

Donna remembers watching the coverage and feeling an uneasy sense of recognition. The behaviors reporters described: control, intimidation, violence behind closed doors, felt painfully familiar.

What she had always been told were private marriage problems suddenly had a name.

That realization planted an important seed.

What was happening in her home was not normal.

And she was not alone.

The Pattern of Control

At first, the warning signs were subtle.

Patterns of coercive control slowly became part of everyday life:

• Arguments that always ended with Donna being blamed
  • Monitoring her choices and daily activities
  • Limiting friendships and outside relationships
  • Turning small issues into major conflicts
  • Framing control as protection or concern

The message remained the same: keep family issues private.

The phrase “we don’t air our dirty laundry” reinforced the silence. Asking for help felt like betrayal. Speaking honestly felt disloyal.

Many survivors describe the same experience. The longer abuse continues, the harder it becomes to imagine leaving.

At one point, the shame surrounding divorce became so overwhelming that Donna briefly believed ending her life might be easier than facing public judgment.

This is one of the devastating effects of coercive control. It slowly shrinks a person’s world until silence seems safer than change.

The Night Everything Changed

Donna’s turning point started with a simple disagreement.

A slammed car door triggered an argument that rapidly turned into hours of intimidation and emotional pressure. What began as a small conflict grew into something much more dangerous.

As the confrontation escalated, Donna struggled to breathe. During the chaos, her husband covered her mouth, even though her nose was already blocked. In that moment, he unintentionally almost suffocated her.

Panic surged as she fought for air.

A terrifying realization struck her: she might not survive.

When blood finally cleared, and air returned, something inside Donna shifted. The fear that had kept her silent for so long gave way to clarity. She realized just how close she had come to losing her life.

Donna walked out.

Even after leaving, the emotional aftermath remained complicated. Fear and shame persisted. Like many survivors of domestic violence, her initial instinct was still to protect the person who hurt her. She hid bruises, avoided explanations, and tried to keep up the appearance that everything was normal.

But something had already changed.

The silence that once felt like a rule was beginning to break.

When Someone Finally Named the Abuse

Donna’s next turning point took place in a small counseling office near a hospital emergency room.

A counselor listened carefully and said words Donna had never heard spoken about her situation:

“You are a battered wife.”

At first, she rejected the idea. Her husband was respected in the community and active in church. His public image made the label difficult to accept.

Later, Donna read a magazine article describing the warning signs of domestic abuse. It included a checklist of controlling behaviors.

As she read, the pattern became clear:

• Restricted friendships
  • Physical intimidation
  • Blocking exits during arguments
  • Monitoring daily decisions
  • Grabbing or restraining arms

She checked yes repeatedly.

The truth became impossible to ignore.

With that clarity came a referral to House of Ruth, where survivor support groups and counseling provided a lifeline.

For the first time, Donna met other women who understood exactly what she had experienced.

Healing and Rebuilding

Recovery from domestic violence takes time, support, and patience.

Donna began rebuilding her life step by step:

Attending counseling and trauma-informed therapy
• Participating in survivor support groups
• Reconnecting with faith in a healthier way
• Learning to trust her own judgment again
• Establishing boundaries and recognizing warning signs

One simple question became central to her healing:

“What do I want to do?”

A Life Restored

Years later, Donna discovered something she once believed was impossible: peace.

She met a widower whose consistent kindness revealed a completely different kind of relationship, one built on respect, safety, and mutual care.

Today, she is a wife, a grandmother, and a woman who recognizes the power of speaking truth.

Her story reminds us of something important:

Silence can hide abuse. Truth opens the path to healing
and community and support make recovery possible.

If you’re in an abusive relationship and feel trapped, help is available. Domestic violence advocates, shelters, counselors, and survivor groups are prepared to listen and support you.

Sometimes healing begins with one honest step.

One conversation.

Or one brave question:

What do I want to do?

National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.)
Call or text 800-799-7233 (SAFE)
Chat at thehotline.org
Available 24/7, confidential, and free.

Listen to Donna’s story: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1771834/episodes/18687445